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Raise your hand if you love spoiling your dog. Okay – now, lower it if you did not buy your dog his own $20,000 pet bed. No? How about an $800 dog bowl? Easy one this time – $65 dog perfume?
Any hands left up?
Let’s be honest – our dogs don’t care how much we spend on them. We might buy the more expensive dog food because it’s fresher and healthier, but c’mon. These are the same dogs that will eat still-warm piles off the lawn if you’re not looking. They don’t care if they’re pulling the squeaker out of a $5 or $500 dog toy so long as that toy is flat when they’re done with it.
But believe it or not, those crazy price tags I mentioned totally exist on some of the swankiest pet gear in the world. Don’t feel bad if your pocketbook feels a little too light to purchase any of these outrageous gifts. I can’t even SPELL the word “Versace” without help. (Thanks, spellcheck.) But someone out there has a dog who is living it up with some very posh pet products.
If you’re looking to get your dog a very, very special, very expensive gift this year (as well as maybe an equity loan) look no further. These are some of the most outrageously expensive dog products that you can buy right now.
1. Versace Crystal Medusa Dog Rain Coat – $325
While we simple folk are still poppin’ tags at the thrift shop like a Macklemore, there are dogs out there who are strolling in the rain wearing this chic Versace raincoat. (Getting the hang of spelling the word “Versace” now.) The coat is made from 100% polyester and must be, according to their instructions, hand-washed and laid flat to dry. Your dog will look super cool in the Crystal Medusa raincoat while you’re bagging up the business he makes during his walkies – which you can do with your $275 Versace Icon Pet Waste Bag Holder. Versace.com
2. Cashmere Bespoke Dog Sweater – $525 – $906
If you’re going to buy something for your dog, why shouldn’t it be made just for your dog? This sweater doesn’t exist until you order it to your dog’s exact measurements. The cashmere used is sourced from small geese that have been bred in Mongolia since the 15th century, and only at altitudes between 4,000 and 6,000 feet. The under-fleece is harvested in the spring, and each goose only produces, at most, 200 grams of the material – that’s only a little more than 7 ounces! BitchNewYork.com
“Not a simple sweater, but a chic and elegant dress, created with passion and love for dogs, dedicated to those who really love their pets.”
3. Thebes Pet Bed – $1,545
According to Haute House Home:
“Homer praised the wealth of the Ancient Egyptian city of Thebes in the Iliad when he mentioned the “heaps of precious ingots” that gleamed brightly.”
This bed was named for a city so lousy with wealth that they just left their ingots out in a bunch of heaps. Pretty tacky showing off, ancient Egyptians. I prefer to keep my ingots under the bathroom sink where no one can see them, along with my dish soap and bleach. Like a lady.
Anyway – your dog can lounge like a little Egyptian pharaoh in their own plush pet bed. If looking at your dog lounging on their luxury bed makes you a little envious, you can get one of your own to match for just under $7,000. HauteHouseHome.com
4. BNY’s Toxic Dog Collar, $3,300-$4,785
Nothing says “chic” like a shiny collar. This collar from BNY is made custom according to your dog’s own neck measurements and is shipped to you directly from the designer in Sweden. Made of leather and “fancy stones,” your pup will stand out among the crowd at the dog park. If your dog is like mine, though, you may want to remove it before she finds something smelly and/or sticky to roll in. For an extra $1,400, you can add a matching leash for your dashing doggy. BitchNewYork.com
5. Luxury Leather Cube Dog Bed – $1070 – $1,889
I’m not a big fan of leather, but I would happily lounge in this leather dog cube. Even if you find yourself totally broke with just your dog and his thousand-dollar dog cube – remember, it’s for your dog. The cube is made with genuine leather that is given a soft texture thanks to a special finishing process. It’s also a bit more practical than some other dog beds – this one can be cleaned with a wet cloth, so if your dog likes to dive into mud puddles at the dog park, you don’t have to worry about stains if they rush to their bed without wiping their paws. For those eco-conscious pups, the bed can even be purchased in faux leather. ChelseaDogs.com
6. Sexy Beast Dog Fragrance – $69 – $850
Nobody wants to be the human with the stinky dog. Sexy Beast Dog Fragrance is the hot fragrance that keeps your dog smelling… sexy? (…huh?) According to the product description, it’s a
“unique blend of bergamot and vanilla-infused musk combined with natural patchouli, mandarin, and nutmeg oil. The sexy beast dog perfume will also give your dog a beautiful and sensual soft-touch finish.”
Wow.
The perfume has since been discontinued so scoop up a bottle if you see it. And if you want a little bling on your bottle, you can get a limited edition version with Swarovski crystals for $850. HealthyPets.com
7. Dog Mansion – $325,000
Who says your dog can’t be a homeowner? Definitely not Paris Hilton. Many dog lovers don’t exactly love Hilton for carrying around her Chihuahua in a purse like a furry cell phone in the early 2000s, but you may be surprised to learn that she genuinely loves her animals. She rescues, donates, fundraises for shelters, and keeps her pets for their entire lives – which some people have speculated that not all celebrities do once they get older and perhaps not as cute. She even sprung for this sweet dog mansion for her pack of pups. Hilton’s haute home for hounds ran around $325,000. But you can get your pup their own little backyard abode for around $9,000. Only a little more expensive than that plastic igloo at Costco. BitchNewYork.com
8. Fausta Dog Toy – $142
This may not be on the high-end of the price scale of this page, but this is pretty pricey for something your dog is expected to tear apart. This toy is extra adorable and, yet, squeaker-less. However, it is made with a special fabric that has been produced in Tuscany with the same procedures that were used when it was first created in the Middle Ages. Your dog will be de-stuffing a little bit of history as he tears apart his luxury dog toy. BitchNewYork.com
9. Dog Tiara – $4.2 Million
Most humans, when head-over-heels in love, believe that their dogs are royalty. That might have been the inspiration behind this $4.2 million dollar tiara when it was designed by a young Thai jeweler in 2009. Riwin Jirapolsek designed the teeny tiara for his senior Maltese dog, Kanune, and unveiled it at a Bangkok dog show. Made from titanium and studded with 250 carats of emeralds and diamonds, the tiara stood out amongst the other products at the show. Kanune may not be all that spoiled, though – this tiara is not everyday wear for him. However, Jirapolsek did say that Kanune did wear hair clips daily, and he had plans to design a diamond-encrusted hair clip to keep Kanune’s fur out of his eyes.
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